Bogus Gold

Brooke White lead us off this week, and I have a confession to make. I think I've entirely lost my fear of this girl as a closeted psychopath, and actually kind of like her now. Even the stalker lyrics of her song choice last week couldn't rekindle my fear. I realized this as I actually looked forward to her performance this week. She chose "Jolene," which fit her voice nicely, as did her decision to self-accompany on acoustic guitar. The only truly unusual aspect to this song for her was how implausible it sounded hearing a gorgeous blonde girl sing a song from the perspective of a loser-girl who can only beg a prettier girl not to seduce away the only man who would ever want her. However Brooke did seem to pour herself into the lyrics with that typical earnestness and believability we've come to expect from her. In her vocal anyway. Her face was smiling and flirting with the studio audience in a way ill suited to the song. She had a little trouble finding the pitch initially, but found it by the first refrain and never lost it again. Also, this performance began the night's trend of having extra musicians accompanying the performers right up on stage with them. A trend which seemed to distract Simon into critiquing Brooke like they were supposed to be a band together, which made little sense, but it was a rough night for the judges altogether. This was a pretty solid performance, and probably one of the best starting performances of the season.

David Cook came next, and I really wish people would stop whining about him "stealing" arrangements from other artists. Here's how the show works people... the Idolateers choose songs, the producers try to get the rights so they can do them, and then they perform. If along the way the contestant wants to pull a Blake Lewis and invent a new arrangement they can, but that's not a requirement. Anyway, in an apparent attempt to appease the whiners they made a point to note that David Cook did his own arrangement this week of the song, "Little Sparrow." And it was a pretty nice arrangement too. Made a country song sound rock-like and modern not unlike Irish groups like the Pogues have long been doing with Celtic folk tunes (which form the foundation of most American country music, just as a point of gratuitous trivia) for ages, but rarely happens in American music for whatever reason. This wasn't really a breakout performance, or a stunner like he pulled last week. But it was solid, professional sounding, and very good. David showed off the upper range of his voice more than we've heard in the past, and once again delivered flawlessly. At the judges table, Simon made some weird comment about David making "a song about sparrows" sound good, because he either didn't listen to the lyrics or doesn't understand what a metaphor is. After two performances Idolateers 2, Judges 0.

Ramiele Mulabay came out next singing "Do I Ever Cross Your Mind." Of all the contestants, Ramiele was portrayed as being the one most intimidated and star-struck meeting Dolly Parton. Has Dolly really been that big a deal with the kids during the past 20 years, which are the only ones Ramiele has been alive? I dunno. Eliot Yamin freaked the hell out meeting Stevie Wonder a couple seasons back and I bought that, so I guess I'll buy this too. As for the performance, wow. This one illustrated to me how great the contestants are on Idol this season. Oh I didn't like Ramiele here. No no. It illustrated this because Ramiele delivered a performance that would have made her safe among a top 9 in probably any other season. But among this crowd it stood out as pageanty and amateurish, even though she sounded vocally stronger this week than she has for a while. Once again she made a poor song choice. Once again she had a few pitch problems (though nothing close to the disaster last week). But overall it was a pretty solid job. However her performance was just bouncing across the stage, smiling and singing in a manner that was the very depiction of "insincere" and "trying to impress." The judges babbled some nonsense, until Simon called it forgettable and cruise-ship material. We'll give that round to the judges for that one.

Jason Castro followed, once again with his acoustic guitar, singing "Traveling Through." We're going to ignore Dolly's very bad joke upon meeting Jason and saying she would "dread" to have to do those "locks." Oh, I just mentioned it? Dang! Anyway as soon as this one started it had a good feel to it. Jason has been running on cruise control for a few weeks now, and right from the start this one seemed to be a pick up from that level. It was a nice song choice. The range suited him. The tempo suited him. It was arranged in a manner that wasn't very country sounding (as an aside, that was true of most of the night's arrangements). And really I listened to this one start to finish liking it better and better as it went on. By the end the wife and I were nodding and commenting to one another how it was probably his second best performance ever on the show. And playing it back this morning I confirmed it. Very nice job. Then at the judges table Paula Abdul was the only one who seemed to get it, and that is just wrong. Simon talked about it like it was awful, which it simply wasn't on any level. We were actually off to a very good night so far, but you'd never know it listening to the judges. After four rounds, Idolateers 3, Judges 1.

Carly Smithson was up next choosing, "Here You Come Again," the only song choice performed but not actually written by Dolly Parton. Dolly thought the song suited Carly's voice better than her own. Of course, Carly has a pretty amazing voice. She just needs to learn to translate that into better performances, because she's still seeming to miss some of that "X" factor they occasionally mention, though not really much this season. However for the first time in a couple of weeks, Carly chose a song that could show off both the tender and the power side of her voice. For once the only power notes she hit were in places they actually fit, rather than gratuitous showing off. As much as one expects Carly to amaze with her vocals, this one still stood out for its amazing control, as well as a more suitable interpretation than a few of her others. At the judges table, Simon decided to focus on her wardrobe, because he suddenly thought he was Paula and forgot why he was there or something. Really... this night was shaping up so well I was starting to feel bad that the judges didn't get invited to view the thing this week, and had their comments pre-recorded, because I was starting to lack a better explanation for the disconnect. Idolateers 4, Judges 1.

Up next was David Archuleta, who has to remain among the very front of the front-runners even after a couple sub-par performances. Whatever "X factor" Carly lacks, David has in excess, even if he seems as puzzled over it as anything. The only really annoying thing about David A. is the way the judges and producers so transparently pimp him above the other contestants. Which isn't really David's fault but starts to cling to him negatively regardless. Anyway, David sang "Smoky Mountain Memories," and to listen to the judges it was flawless. But as you cannot count on the judges to give honest feedback about David A. on a normal week, and as this was an especially weird week for them, let's start with the good and then note the less-than-good. It was a flawless vocal, showcasing everything good about David A.'s voice. It had the pure, sincere, controlled tone that makes him so perfectly suited to the ballad-style songs he seems to prefer. That said, the lyrics were strangely old for such a young singer, and his interpretation of them was that of a voice student still learning the very basics of that sort of thing. This is one of David's flaws that has gone, and probably will go, unmentioned by the judges, but it's not the first time we've seen it. And it makes an awful lot of David's performances sound the same. You don't notice it so much week to week, but put them back to back like they would be on a CD and it's pretty noticeable. Anyway, David was good, but the judges failure to do any critiquing of him at all while finding time to mention the wardrobe of some contestants, and critique the performance of the band rather than the contestant in others lose them another round. Idolateers 5, Judges 1.

Kristy Lee Cook came next with "Coat of Many Colors." Kristy has a natural country style that I figured would suit her well this week. And indeed she turned in one of the night's only truly country-sounding arrangements in her performance. And you know what? She sounded really good doing it. There was one spot with some wandering pitch, but this was probably Kristy's best vocal performance of the season (despite the judges insisting last week's vocal was, which it totally wasn't; they were just scared of criticizing the uber-patriotic song on any level). Kristy's main problem here is just that there are so many better singers and more charismatic performers left this season. This was a stronger performance than Ramiele gave, but it shared the same particular flaw. This was a safe performance for a top 9 most any other season. This is not any other season. And wouldn't it be ironic to finally lose perpetual bottom 3 contender Kristy after her strongest performance rather than one of her weak ones? Idol seems to deliver that result at least a couple of times per season. Anyway, the judges comments were unhelpful and all over the place, with Randy blowing it off as just being her theme, Paula calling it her strongest performance, and Simon calling it forgettable. As these comments can't possibly all describe the same performance it continued the night's bad trend for judging. Idolateers 6, Judges 1.

Syesha Mercado came next, who has seemed to be dropping like a stone lately and doesn't seem to understand why because she's singing very well. This week she continued what I think is the reason by choosing "I Will Always Love You," which is far more associated with Whitney Houston than Dolly Parton. There's always room on Idol for a Whitney style power-diva. But if you look back over the shows winners, they eventually run out their welcome as people have heard that act before. It's odd because coming out of Hollywood week she seemed like someone who would be marked especially for originality. Yet as the weeks wear on, she's becoming more and more predictable and formulaic. Picking a Dolly Parton song covered famously by Whitney Houston is a perfect example. Anyway, the early part of the performance... the part before she got into the famous Whitney diva power part... was actually pretty good. She even had a stab at making an original statement in spite of the predictable song choice for a moment. But then... like some gravitational pull sucking her in... the music paused for a moment, visions of The Bodyguard flashed through the mind, the lighting changed to dramatic red, and Syesha and the band together belted out... "And Eeeeeeeyyyyyyyiiiieee.... will always loooooove yoooooooo-hoooo-weeeooowoooo...." And from that moment on it didn't really matter how well she sang, because this is exactly why she's starting to bottom out regardless how good she sounds. And in a rarity of the evening, the judges comments made sense, with Simon noting the Whitney imitation problem. Idolateers 6, Judges 2.

Closing out the show tonight was Michael Johns. You might be thinking, why give the "what if Jim Morrison fronted for Queen" guy the pimp spot on Dolly Parton week, of all of them. You could be forgiven for wondering that. I think the only plausible answer was "it was his turn." Either that or... because he had a kick-ass arrangement going this week, unexpectedly taking "It's All Wrong, But It's All Right" in an electric blues / blue-eyed soul direction which totally worked. Let me take that back... it didn't just "work." It blew the doors off. I think I had forgotten Michael ever could sing like this. Last week he did really well on charisma and stage performance, but the vocals were frankly a little wandering. This week he showed off absolutely perfect control, matching his raspy power with a surprising tenderness and that terrific ability of his to pour his heart into what he's singing. In a season well above average in terms of great performances, this one has to be another true standout. And more than anything it served notice that Michael Johns may not be content to stay among the also-rans on a season dominated by the "two Davids." If he keeps this kind of performance up, we'll have another dark horse rising in a hurry. Didn't matter what the judges said here. Even though they all liked it, Michael wins by a mile. Final score: Idolateers 7, Judges 2.

So let's sum it all up. This was a really strong week for almost everyone. The arrangements were almost all well suited to the performers - some better than others, but no really glaring lemons. I hope the judges get to watch the show on video or something, because it seems a shame they mostly missed it.

Best of the night was definitely Michael Johns, who was the only one to turn in a true season highlight. I think he's finally cemented his personality beyond "the Jim Morrison / Queen" guy. Which bodes very well for him in future weeks.

After Michael, I'd call out the very strong performances of the "two Davids," Cook and Archuleta. Neither blew us away this week, but both delivered exactly the kind of performance that makes them so strong.

Following that I'm going with Jason Castro and Brooke White, as slightly less strong than the Davids, but similarly great examples of their two distinctive styles.

Carly Smithson had one of the strongest and best vocals of the night. But unless tattoos and a slight brogue are better substitutes than I'm guessing they are, she's starting to suffer from a lack of distinctive style present in all of the ones above.

Kristy Lee Cook and Syesha Mercado both had pretty strong performances also, with Syesha showing a bit more vocal talent but less ability to find a niche likely to keep her around, and Kristy finding her niche but perhaps lacking enough "wow" factor to fill it much longer.

Ramiele once again delivered the weakest performance of the evening, and yet, Jasmine Trias like, she keeps missing the bottom three anyway.

Well this week I'm going to make the unusual prediction that the three I believe most deserve the bottom three are actually in the bottom three. That would mean Ramiele, Syesha, and Kristy.

Dare I predict once more that Ramiele will leave the show just because she deserves to? Nah... Idol justice is never that fitting. I'm picking Syesha to go this week. She will not be remotely happy about it, and stories will appear about how the Americans are racists for kicking off the black contestants two weeks in a row.


UPDATE: THE RESULTS

Dolly doesn't sound so great anymore, David Cook will live, and Simon thinks Carly is cute no matter how his comment sounded last night. On to the results...

Our bottom three for the night didn't stun me. Syesha connected better this week than I thought she did, obviously. Which is good and all, because she certainly didn't give the worst performance or have the least talent remaining. She didn't even hit the bottom three this week.

Ramiele and Kristen did though. And Brooke joined them for the first time as tearfully as you would have expected. But Brooke was merely dangled and yanked back to safety much as expected and it was down to Kristy and Ramiele. In a surprise to me, America made the right decision and Ramiele was headed home.

Let's not forget she's got great talent. She's not a pro, after all. And she's still young. But she wasn't ready for this level yet, and it was a nice time to see her exit.

The remaining top eight are just glittering with style and personality compared to prior seasons, so it will be an interesting rest of the ride.

Next week the theme is... country. Wait, AFTER Dolly Parton week the theme is country? As if Dolly Parton week itself wasn't country? That's what we're told. Oh well. Jesus take the Wheel and drive us on to next week.